I´m apologising in advance for spelling mistakes and a lack of photos. Deal with it.
Right.. so after my close call with a shoot up in Columbia, Laura (Jana's mom) and I went and shot some guns. She's a pretty avid fan of guns and the like. She has a small arsenal of guns, grenades, RPG's, landmines and armoured vehicles. Well.. not really, but she does have a few guns. So we went to her local firing range after the comprehensive safety talk (don't point a loaded gun at people, animals or hippies etc...). We were shooting the a semi-automatic .22 and a Smith and Wesson .38. The .22 took me by surprise at first. I guess just because it's loud etc.. Perhaps startled is a better word to use than surprised. So, after getting my grounding with the .22 and getting to know the gun and firing a few clips we moved onto the much smaller short-barreled .38. Fuck! I wasn't prepared for that! I actually yelped! And the recoil! there's some kick off a gun like that..
Right.. so after my close call with a shoot up in Columbia, Laura (Jana's mom) and I went and shot some guns. She's a pretty avid fan of guns and the like. She has a small arsenal of guns, grenades, RPG's, landmines and armoured vehicles. Well.. not really, but she does have a few guns. So we went to her local firing range after the comprehensive safety talk (don't point a loaded gun at people, animals or hippies etc...). We were shooting the a semi-automatic .22 and a Smith and Wesson .38. The .22 took me by surprise at first. I guess just because it's loud etc.. Perhaps startled is a better word to use than surprised. So, after getting my grounding with the .22 and getting to know the gun and firing a few clips we moved onto the much smaller short-barreled .38. Fuck! I wasn't prepared for that! I actually yelped! And the recoil! there's some kick off a gun like that..
So it turns out that I'm not too bad at the old gun shooting thing! I managed to hit the big paper target and all! No paper's gonna get the better of me if I'm armed.. It was great fun and also a first for me. We ate in an interesting mongolian place called Hu-Hot where you put a load of ingredients in a bowel, make a sauce from oils etc that they recommend and give it to one of four guys standing around a massive bbq type setup who cook it for you. It's a pretty sweet idea as you can really make your food to your own tastes except that there's really no-one to complain to if you don't like it. Thanks guys, great restaurant!
The next day was action packed with all sorts of activities. It took an early start because Laura Crouch and I were to drive to Lake of the Ozarks which is shaped like a Chinese dragon. We met Nick there as he works out that way (as a barman who cleverly extrapolates tips from business men, tourists, older ladies and most other species of consumer endemic to the area). We rented a pontoon from two very helpful and tanned girls in bikinis and spent the day trying various dives off the boat. One which saw me looking as though I had been dropped from a helicopter and another which had nick looking as though he was swimming through thin air.
So we dropped back the pontoon after exploring the lake, islands and diving techniques which resulted in red and tender backs and headed into town to get some lunch in another time-warped bar. Time warps seem to be a common theme on this trip so far. I must do a little entry on that alone. The day got better. We drove back to Columbia and met Jana and Jake in a car-park (all sounds a bit Watergate..) for the next big activity of the day. A BALLOON RIDE!! It was supposed to be a surprise. I was told I was allowed to guess as much as I liked as to what Wednesday´s surprise was but I guess I didn´t come close. Someone had let the bag out of the cat (whatever, I´m tired.. you´re lucky to be getting any blog at all..) the previous night at dinner. It was still a suprise then so the desired effect was still there. After driving around industrial estates looking for a space to launch the balloon we found just the right place. perhaps a little odd though..
Getting the balloon started was kinda funny.. after they inflated it on the ground and it looked all ready to go, they let it down again. It seemed a little pointless and we were all a little perplexed. It turns out they had run out of gas and it looked as though we may not have been going anywhere that day. They pointed out that it´s often better to find out on the ground that you have very little gas, rather than when in the air. So they borrowed another basket and away we went. I hadn´t realised just how green Columbia was. The balloon was such a cool way to see and area. Looking out the windows of planes is fun and all that, but they have to climb eventually so that nothing is distinguishable. In the balloon, children cycle after you, families wave and dogs don´t know what to do so they bark. It´s a really peaceful ride.
Landing was fun. Apparently, they only way you can control direction in a balloon is by going up and down so steering toward an open space to land on is a no no.. It ended up that we kept on floating by fields ad our gas was running low. We ended up clipping tree-tops as we had lowered her for a landing between trees! It´s tradition to land with Champagne in case you land in someone´s garden and find yourself needing to placate them. So, a Champagne toast was had and a specially made t-shirt was presented with my name on it and all! photos to follow, this computer doesn´t seem to want to co-operate. The back of the t-shirt says ¨getting high in Columbia¨.
So that was a big day
I met Jana´s grandmother the next day. This woman is 91 and quicker off the mark than I am! To boot, she has an interesting story. Not having learned english until about the age of 14 she grew up in a German settlement near the Florida-Alabama boarder prior to World War II. She can also do 1000-piece jigsaw puzzles blind-folded.. I hope I´m that capable in body and mind when (if) I hit 91! Home then and got dressed for a night on the town. The night was spent in a comedy club watching two very different comics. One of Jana´s friends, Crystal, had one a comedy office party in this night club so took a big gang of us along. The first comic was a self-proclaimed hick from Indiana and the main act was a large, sex-obsessed middle-aged black lady who used to be a crack-head and a prostitute. She was a rapid-fire torrent of foul language and hard-hitting jokes. Great way to start a night. Then down to the night-club. I was sitting at a bar where a sign warned that ¨no more than 10 people at a time could dance on the bar¨(!!). Imagine that kinda stuff back in Ireland!! Yeah.. I know.. I can´t imagine it either. After all, the church does say that women who dance on bars are whores and going to a special hell just for them..
Crystal, Xaviar and I ended up in a diner which had been established as early as 1949. I ended up arguing with the waitress that the ¨biscuit¨she was showing my was not a biscuit but in fact either a scone or a malformed english muffing. I don´t think the english really eat those muffins.
My stance on the biscuit issue back-fired when my french toast was served with thin little bread and not the big think stuff. Ah well.. Just goes to show what standing by your beliefs gets you into!?
The next day was spent napping and recovering. When I eventually roused we went to Laura and Johns for a good-bye dinner where we oo´d and aaah´d over pictures of Jana when she was growing up. She was such an adorable kid! And the image of mom. In some of the photos you could have convinced someone that the pictures of Jana were. This was a great night. It was good t get to say good-bye to Laura and John.. She really is my American mom. I get looked after so much! Spoiled one might say!
Off to the Airport. Jana drove out and James was there for support. Thanks James!! He was also great to have in the airport as he managed to dissuade the tears. Saying goodbye to people who I care about is getting tiresome. Guess Ill just have to grin and bare it!
It was so cool being in Missouri and meeting the Crouch gang and their various associates on their own turf. I admit that initially i thought I as going to be a Little bored and that Missouri was going to be a desolate wasteland. How wrong I was. Missouri is full of good culture, great scenery and fantastic people to match. I had such a great time! Thanks everyone associated. Thanks for making Missouri so memorable! I´ll return!
Go, when I flew from Kansas City to Denver I was due to wait four hours for my flight to San Francisco but I noticed that there was one boarding just I got off mine. I spoke to some guy behind a check-desk who thought that it was a good thing that I had an irish passport. He managed to put me on the flight that was leaving right away but I wouldn´t have my luggage at the other end. It was due to this whim I met the prototype that is Richard.
More to follow. I have to go use the little ladies room and get on a bus that will meander through Brazilian roads towards Florianopolis for 12 hours.
Adeus!
The next day was action packed with all sorts of activities. It took an early start because Laura Crouch and I were to drive to Lake of the Ozarks which is shaped like a Chinese dragon. We met Nick there as he works out that way (as a barman who cleverly extrapolates tips from business men, tourists, older ladies and most other species of consumer endemic to the area). We rented a pontoon from two very helpful and tanned girls in bikinis and spent the day trying various dives off the boat. One which saw me looking as though I had been dropped from a helicopter and another which had nick looking as though he was swimming through thin air.
So we dropped back the pontoon after exploring the lake, islands and diving techniques which resulted in red and tender backs and headed into town to get some lunch in another time-warped bar. Time warps seem to be a common theme on this trip so far. I must do a little entry on that alone. The day got better. We drove back to Columbia and met Jana and Jake in a car-park (all sounds a bit Watergate..) for the next big activity of the day. A BALLOON RIDE!! It was supposed to be a surprise. I was told I was allowed to guess as much as I liked as to what Wednesday´s surprise was but I guess I didn´t come close. Someone had let the bag out of the cat (whatever, I´m tired.. you´re lucky to be getting any blog at all..) the previous night at dinner. It was still a suprise then so the desired effect was still there. After driving around industrial estates looking for a space to launch the balloon we found just the right place. perhaps a little odd though..
Getting the balloon started was kinda funny.. after they inflated it on the ground and it looked all ready to go, they let it down again. It seemed a little pointless and we were all a little perplexed. It turns out they had run out of gas and it looked as though we may not have been going anywhere that day. They pointed out that it´s often better to find out on the ground that you have very little gas, rather than when in the air. So they borrowed another basket and away we went. I hadn´t realised just how green Columbia was. The balloon was such a cool way to see and area. Looking out the windows of planes is fun and all that, but they have to climb eventually so that nothing is distinguishable. In the balloon, children cycle after you, families wave and dogs don´t know what to do so they bark. It´s a really peaceful ride.
Landing was fun. Apparently, they only way you can control direction in a balloon is by going up and down so steering toward an open space to land on is a no no.. It ended up that we kept on floating by fields ad our gas was running low. We ended up clipping tree-tops as we had lowered her for a landing between trees! It´s tradition to land with Champagne in case you land in someone´s garden and find yourself needing to placate them. So, a Champagne toast was had and a specially made t-shirt was presented with my name on it and all! photos to follow, this computer doesn´t seem to want to co-operate. The back of the t-shirt says ¨getting high in Columbia¨.
So that was a big day
I met Jana´s grandmother the next day. This woman is 91 and quicker off the mark than I am! To boot, she has an interesting story. Not having learned english until about the age of 14 she grew up in a German settlement near the Florida-Alabama boarder prior to World War II. She can also do 1000-piece jigsaw puzzles blind-folded.. I hope I´m that capable in body and mind when (if) I hit 91! Home then and got dressed for a night on the town. The night was spent in a comedy club watching two very different comics. One of Jana´s friends, Crystal, had one a comedy office party in this night club so took a big gang of us along. The first comic was a self-proclaimed hick from Indiana and the main act was a large, sex-obsessed middle-aged black lady who used to be a crack-head and a prostitute. She was a rapid-fire torrent of foul language and hard-hitting jokes. Great way to start a night. Then down to the night-club. I was sitting at a bar where a sign warned that ¨no more than 10 people at a time could dance on the bar¨(!!). Imagine that kinda stuff back in Ireland!! Yeah.. I know.. I can´t imagine it either. After all, the church does say that women who dance on bars are whores and going to a special hell just for them..
Crystal, Xaviar and I ended up in a diner which had been established as early as 1949. I ended up arguing with the waitress that the ¨biscuit¨she was showing my was not a biscuit but in fact either a scone or a malformed english muffing. I don´t think the english really eat those muffins.
My stance on the biscuit issue back-fired when my french toast was served with thin little bread and not the big think stuff. Ah well.. Just goes to show what standing by your beliefs gets you into!?
The next day was spent napping and recovering. When I eventually roused we went to Laura and Johns for a good-bye dinner where we oo´d and aaah´d over pictures of Jana when she was growing up. She was such an adorable kid! And the image of mom. In some of the photos you could have convinced someone that the pictures of Jana were. This was a great night. It was good t get to say good-bye to Laura and John.. She really is my American mom. I get looked after so much! Spoiled one might say!
Off to the Airport. Jana drove out and James was there for support. Thanks James!! He was also great to have in the airport as he managed to dissuade the tears. Saying goodbye to people who I care about is getting tiresome. Guess Ill just have to grin and bare it!
It was so cool being in Missouri and meeting the Crouch gang and their various associates on their own turf. I admit that initially i thought I as going to be a Little bored and that Missouri was going to be a desolate wasteland. How wrong I was. Missouri is full of good culture, great scenery and fantastic people to match. I had such a great time! Thanks everyone associated. Thanks for making Missouri so memorable! I´ll return!
Go, when I flew from Kansas City to Denver I was due to wait four hours for my flight to San Francisco but I noticed that there was one boarding just I got off mine. I spoke to some guy behind a check-desk who thought that it was a good thing that I had an irish passport. He managed to put me on the flight that was leaving right away but I wouldn´t have my luggage at the other end. It was due to this whim I met the prototype that is Richard.
More to follow. I have to go use the little ladies room and get on a bus that will meander through Brazilian roads towards Florianopolis for 12 hours.
Adeus!
No comments:
Post a Comment